Vitamin We #7: Loving Your Mirrors

Happy June! 🥰

It’s getting way warmer in the Northern Hemisphere; here in sunny Hong Kong, we are constantly battling with “to air-con or not to air-con” at 34ºC with 75% relative humidity 🫠. And no, ice-creams or cold drinks actually do more harm than good according to TCM, but I’ll spare you with my unprofessional advice for now.

How’s life with you? Are you feeling more inspired to create as ideas are floating more playfully in the air with plants, birds, insects, and humans getting more lively?

This week, we are exploring a creative process that we’ve all been through - questioning “Is my work good enough?”

And since what we create are extensions of who we are, like a mirror🪞, then if our work is not good enough, then does that mean we, the creators, are not good enough?! (I’m sure this sounds VERY familiar)

🤔

Wait, what if, self-pity is actually a subtle form of pride?

What if, when we begin loving the Work-In-Progress of who we are right now (vs the future perfect self) and appreciating all that the universe has been conspiring to support us in becoming who we are today, we’ll start feeling better about ourselves?

“There is no failure, only feedback.”

Let’s keep creating 💪

The word compassion itself derives from Latin and means "to suffer together.”

Compassion for others means to feel the pain as if we were them with a desire to help relieve that pain.

For people who have been through a lot in life, or for HSPs who are naturally more attuned to other people’s emotions, they can develop compassion for others quite naturally because they understand.

They have lived that life.

How about having compassion for OURSELVES?

Self-compassion requires us to do unto ourselves as we would have done unto others (yes, that’s a mirror version of the bible quote).

Like, would you say this mean thing to a friend? If not, why would you beat yourself up with such harsh, judgemental words?

So friends, speak to ourselves with kindness more often.

Listen to our thoughts and emotions without judgment.

Show respect when we talk to and about ourselves.

Accept us for who we are TODAY.

Story #2 below from Fia illustrates vividly how it plays out!

“ Music & Art are my way of projecting my dreams into reality.

My styles are a mirror of who I am, and who I would like to be.

My process always takes me on a journey.

I never know where I’ll end up.

I work on taking the emotion and feeling from my art and composing music to continue telling the story.

My art and music are inseparable.

There are always so many stories to tell as my art and music are an ever-evolving canvas.”

“You are not good enough.

We’ve all heard those words for some time. See them in a comment section, or read them on our friends’ Twitter feeds. To have them directed at you instils the worst feeling in the world.

But some of us tell ourselves that too.

For years I saved images that I had visions for but never could quite edit them to show them. I struggled with lighting, didn’t get the colours right, and couldn’t make them pop. I saw what content other people put out and tried to hold myself to the same standard, operating under the belief that if I didn’t add something new, it wasn’t worth the space it took.

Eventually, I developed a mantra:

Never delete a photograph (this can be applied to digital/painted art as well), for one day you will have developed the skill needed to create what you envisioned.

But this mantra doesn’t help when you sit there, staring at your failed attempt, when the thoughts come crashing down; so what do you do then?

Take a deep breath and close your eyes. Think of all the bad thoughts that your mind tells you. How it’s ugly and not good enough. Then imagine yourself telling your best friend the same about their art.

You wouldn’t do that.

Instead, take a moment to reset before you regard your work. Try to find the good in what you have made so far, or look for what made you take the shot in the first place. Something to be proud of, no matter how small, before you put the image away for the night.

Many times our failures towards ourselves and our visions for a project come from a lack of experience and knowledge to work out what we want to make, and that is fine. This is something I often see among other artists that they berate themselves for their lack of knowledge.

Do not look down on yourself for that! We all learn and explore our creativity at different speeds, and there is no shame in meeting the limits of your current capacity. This is also why you should keep the progression you made on an image and put it aside for later.

Some of my shots have waited years to see the light of day, while others arrive on my desk the same day I take them. Some old ones will make it on there tomorrow, and some will wait forever. So try to save what you fail at and learn to look back at it as you progress, and try to regard your old work with fresh eyes on occasion. Take pride in how far you’ve come.

Here you will find one of my images that had to wait for nearly three years before I found what I wanted to do with them. Sure, I could take better shots now, given the opportunity, and I see the flaws in my execution at the time. But that doesn’t stop me from doing now what I couldn’t do then.

I encourage you to try it. Dig out your rejected old works and your not-quite-good-enoughs, and try your hand at them with the new skills you have learned since.

And take a moment to praise yourself as you would praise a friend.”

Idea #1 Your Ambition, Not Mere Ability Nor Talent, Is The #1 Key To Success:

He started the book with these sentences in big, bold text:

Then he continued, “Why do we strive for excellence when mediocrity is required?” 

In 2023, we can validate that there is a much bigger demand for mediocrity. That’s why we have AI’s mass adoption from writing to graphics to video and music creation because AI’s work is “good enough” 👻

His argument was, imagine a world if we could produce whatever we felt like with no restrictions; with the inborn nature of all creative people, we’ll rebel against these boring excellence - and will have the urge to make things bad, ugly, stupid or look cheap just to be NOT dull 😜.

Well, this explains a lot of what we see in the art & NFT scene - e.g., Why would people put ETH into a wallet that says “you get nothing”? 😅

P.S. This paragraph also brings déjà vu since many new-age spiritual concepts describe exactly this - It’s too boring to be able to create whatever we can think of instantly because all possibilities already exist; that’s why the “higher consciousness” creates the human body (physical matter), time and space as the limitations, so the “game of life” can be more challenging, thus fun to be experienced 👀 

Idea #2 Do Not Cover Your Ideas:

If Paul Arden was still alive, he would definitely love web3 :)

Idea #3 When You Get Stuck, Draw With A Different Pen:

Do you realize your handwriting looks different when you are using new stationery? It’s because you are probably holding the pen with a different muscle alignment.

The same is true for our creative muscles!

Finally, a bonus one:

I’m not sure which age group you identify with, but I’m sure this pie chart stirs some thoughts!