Vitamin We #12: Befriend Emotions

Thank you for your support since April!

It’s been a joy to write to you every week, and I hope the newsletter also brings you some value as you read them :)

A major part of why we do what we do, is that we want to destigmatize the value of ALL RANGE of emotions in a world where anything that interrupts productivity and efficiency is considered “not useful”.

What is your most memorable movie🎞️? I bet that movie is not a camera shooting a concrete wall for 3 hours with nothing happening - My point is, art and life experiences that do not stimulate emotions in us would not be engaging or memorable! we can even say that our most vivid memories mostly consist of experiences that are most emotionally intense.

Our emotions can be like waves - they are just energies in motion and when we observe them as if we are sitting at the shore watching the ocean, very often, they are sharing with us valuable information that our mental thoughts might have overlooked.

Enjoy the stories we’ve curated for you today!

Emotions originate as sensations in the body.

Feelings are influenced by our emotions but are generated from our mental thoughts i.e. the interpretation we give to those sensations.

Emotions are the raw data, a reaction to the present reality, whereas feelings can be diluted by stories we’ve created in our head based on events of the past or fears of the future—not necessarily the truth of the situation.

Therefore, when emotions arise in us, which is a part of human nature, can we sit with our emotions just like our other body sensations like hunger, itchy skin, etc, and allow them to communicate with us without overanalyzing our rational mind, or even resisting and rejecting their rights to exist?

“ Art speaks volumes. A single artwork can start a million conversations. This is what I keep in mind when I create my art.

I always think to myself, what conversation am I leading?

Am I speaking to raise awareness, bring positivity, bring hope?

I chose to represent mental health in my pieces because of the taboo surrounding speaking up about our struggles.

As a neurodivergent individual, it was often hard for me to use my voice, and I always chose art as a medium to express my feelings.

But now I want to express more than my inner stories, but also the stories of others.

I want everyone struggling to have their voices be heard, and understood.

It can often be a daunting and scary experience to open up, but I believe the chance of someone resonating with your form of expression can change lives or even save a life. ”

“ I remember just having all these emotions bottled up inside of me, many different thoughts of sadness, guilt.

Like I'm not a good friend, a good person, and I'm always wrong. Then I started to draw out these emotions; some came out dark, while others came out bright and colourful.

The feeling of releasing these emotions through art was amazing, a huge relief.

Art is my therapy!! ”

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Idea #1: The Hamburger Model:

Ben-Shanar defines happiness as "the overall experience of pleasure (present benefit) AND meaning (future benefit)”.

When we are making choices related to happiness, our attitude and behavior can be categorized into 4 archetypes based on the relationship between the present and future benefits of our choices:

1. Junk-food burger "Hedonism" - Present benefit, future detriment as in “Seek pleasure now and avoid pain”

2. Vege burger "Rat Race" - future benefit, present detriment as in "no pain, no gain"

3. Worse burger "Nihilism" - future detriment, present detriment

4. Ideal burger "Happiness" - future benefit, present benefit

The rat race archetype represents how we were trained in schools from a young age to study hard, get A grades, go to a top college, win a job at a prestige firm, live in a large house etc, as the archetype of success in our DO DO DO culture that focuses on chasing the next goals.

There are high achievers who are extremely Happy, dedicating long hours to their studies and profession, while many feel empty and far from happy. And the key to differentiating them from rat racers is that rat racers do not enjoy what they are doing, and their persistent belief that once they reach a certain destination, they will be happy. 

Plus, we often mistake the RELIEF we feel once we attain our destination for happiness when in fact, they were just an end of stress and burden, which is a temporary feeling! Therefore continue chasing the next goal won't get rat racers real happiness.

Idea #2 Emotion, motion & motivation are intimately linked:

Emotions cause motion: They provide a motive that derives our action, that moves us away from a desireless state, and provides us motivation to act.

Without emotions, we will aspire to nothing; we'll remain indifferent to our actions and thoughts and their ramifications.

We need the cause of our emotions to be meaningful. Animals also have emotions to drive their actions, but they do not have the human capacity to reflect, to be conscious, and to be spiritual - the real sense of the significance of something. It's important that we choose our purpose in accordance with our own values and passions rather than conforming to others’ expectations.

Idea #3 Happiness as the ultimate currency for human beings:

If happiness is the ultimate currency, how rich are you? How rich is our current society (almost bankrupt🥲)?

There is no reason to seek fame, money, or success if they do not contribute happiness in some way. Then, if we can use happiness to translate the values of experiences, we can better compare experiences and hence make more internally-aligned life choices.

Idea #4 The role of goals is not so much to be attained but to liberate us:

Robert M. Pirsig, in Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, describes joining a group of elderly Zen monks mountain-climbing in the Himalayas. Though Pirsig was the youngest, he was the only one who struggled. He focused on the goal of reaching the mountain's peak and was overwhelmed by what still lay ahead, unable to enjoy the climb; he lost his desire and strength to carry on.

The monks also focused on the peak, but only to make sure they were staying on course - knowing that they were headed in the right direction allowed them to focus their attention and enjoy each step.

When we have a destination in mind, at every fork in the road, we are free to focus our full attention on making the most of where we are. So the emphasis of his approach is on having goals, not so much on attaining them; rather than perceiving goals as ends, we can see them as means to facilitate the enjoyment of our present experience.

Personally, I find this perspective helpful, especially when it comes to entrepreneurship!